I come before you in this season of Lent, a time of special grace. I place before you my wretched
life of sin and disobedience. I acknowledge I am a sinner and need of your forgiveness. The
damage I have done is so overwhelming Lord, there is no way that I could even come close to
making amends or making restitution. Lord when I think of the extent of the damage I have
done through my sin I feel I do not deserve to live, let alone have a comfortable life. And I know
this is not an exaggeration. How I wasted your blessings Lord. How I wasted the talents you gave
me. I left the Kings palace to go my own way, only to end up like the prodigal son envying the
pigs their food. I despised what was beautiful in my life and embraced what was repulsive.
I neglected the living waters and drank from the sewers of sin. I turned my back on life and I
embraced death. Lord how deeply I have wounded your loving heart. Lord, have mercy on me.
Even after you spared my life and despite the dire consequences my old life brought upon me,
I continued to entertain the same sin in smaller quantities, justifying to myself that I was not
as bad as I once was. Sin is sin to you Lord irrespective of size. Darkness is darkness. Poison
is poison, regardless of the quantity. You said in your Word that a little yeast sours the entire
dough. Lord, come to my rescue and help me to detest even the slightest bit of sin. To refuse it,
to be reviled by it, to become nauseous at the very thought of it. Let me not make excuses Lord
or try to blame others. Help me to direct all my anger at the real enemy: Sin.
I disobeyed you and left you to pursue the life of my own choosing. In doing this I gave the evil
one full access over my life. He took full advantage of me and stole everything from me, because
that is his nature: to steal, kill and destroy. I listened to the father of lies and I chose to ignore
the grave consequences lured by the momentary pleasure that sin would bring.
Lord, I ask for your grace and your Holy Spirit to help me repent thoroughly and completely and
then make a sincere confession this Lent. You are waiting in the person of a priest to grant me
pardon and sacramental grace. Lord I never want to sin again. I never ever want to hurt you and
hurt anyone ever again. Help me with this Lord that I never again appose you, grieve your Spirit
and thus lose your favor. Lord, I wish to grow in your love and in the new life you desire to give
me. Give me the grace to feel the full extent of the pain I have caused my loved ones on account
of my sins. Let me accept the truth that my sins affect not only me but the whole body of Christ
and community within which I live. I know Lord at times I have tried to block myself from feeling
this pain, because I feared losing control, feared being overwhelmed by sorrow and shame. But
I know Lord that now it is time for me to face the fallout of my actions. I ask for your Holy Spirit,
the gift of fortitude especially, so I can accept responsibility, full and complete responsibility,
with zero excuses, for the pain I have caused you and the people I have hurt.
Lord, I ask also for the gift of intercession for those whom I have hurt. Through prayer and an
altered life that is lived in obedience to your will, let me bring healing and restoration to the
hearts that I have broken through my sin. And the source of this healing will be you, Lord Jesus.
The glory will be yours alone.
Help me Lord in particularly with the sin of pride. Help me to beat my ego down to size, until
it humbly bows before your greatness. Help me Lord to tame it to become a slave of your
Spirit that lives within me. You being the King of the Universe and the Son of the living God,
completely innocent of sin, became a servant of others allowing sinners to mock you, scourge
you, strip you naked and then nail you to the cross and leave you there to die. But I Lord a
sinner, whom you created from dust, rebel and strike back when people point out the slightest
flaw or weakness in me. Break down my ego Lord. It is preventing me from receiving your
blessings. It is keeping me from living out the purpose for which you have created me. Help me
to nail it to your cross daily along with all my other shortcomings. I know it is going to hurt badly
Lord as I do it, but it must be done so I can live. And I know you are going to be by my side to
console me. And when it done it will all be worth it.
Help me Lord put the needs of others before my own. This is so hard for me. Selfishness has
been the source of all my sin. Place within me the desire to consider the needs of others, to
respond to the needs of others starting with the ones closest to me and then extending to those
outside my home. How Lord will I come to love my enemies, as you have commanded me to
do, when I cannot even love those you have given me to love as my own? See Lord how far I am
from where you need me to be? I can never get there without your help. I need your Holy Spirit
Lord. Give me a hunger for more of your Spirit Lord. I need much more of your Spirit than I have.
Treat me Lord like the many lepers that approached you for healing, or the paralytics that were
brought to you to be made well. You had mercy on them and healed them. Have mercy on me
and heal my spiritual handicaps. I have lost so many years of your friendship to sin Lord. There is
not a moment to lose. Lord make haste to help me as I make haste to call out to you this season
of Lent, this time of special grace.
Transform me from the inside Lord to be a completely new creation. The way you changed the
life of Saul Lord, change mine. The way to your changed the life of Peter Lord, change mine. The
way you changed the life of Zacchaeus Lord, change mine. Why them and not me Lord? Am I
not your child? Am I not the sheep of your flock? You are not a partial God. Your Word says so.
You heard the cry of Bartimaeus and restored his sight. Jesus of Nazareth, another Bartimaeus
is calling out to you for spiritual sight. Forgive my sins and let me see you again. Another
Zacchaeus, feeling small having fallen short of your glory, is yearning to catch a glimpse of you.
Come and invite yourself into my home and I will be saved. Yet another Peter overcome by
shame and sorrow of his betrayal of you is looking towards you. Will you not throw upon me the
same penetrating gaze of your tender love so all of my shame melts away and I am consumed by
the fire of your love and mercy? Lord, this Easter let me rise with you from the grave of sin and
into the new life you have gained for me through your resurrection. Amen.
Jamie DeMelo
HSI Media
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